Dear Adam, Jami and Nikki
I hope you are all well. I love you and miss all of you, my one and only son and my two beautiful daughters.
I'm writing this because I have no idea how else to talk to you. This is a public blog but I'm hoping it will reach all of you and that you will read what I have to say. I'm sorry if you would rather not have this in the public space but you have never given me the opportunity to have a say on anything I've been accused of so I am going to write this blog of where I am, what I'm doing, how I got here and how much I miss you all. I'm also going to cover a lot of what happened from my side of the divorce and exile from your lives. Read it or not. It's your choice of course but I hope you will read it. I miss you all so much that my heart aches everyday and my life has had a huge hole in it since you left. To this day, as proof, I am writing this blog. I think about you every day and long to be part of your lives.
For those in the public reading this, I appreciate that some of you might find yourself in a similar position where a divorce has left you as a parent without children. Please feel free to leave your comments, however, I would ask that we not judge one another for the mistakes we've made. Encouragement is, of course, welcome and perhaps some might find strength from others. Personally this has been the single most devastating thing I have had to live with and could use the encouragement and advice.
About dad,
I am 57 years old now and living in a little town on the east coast of North Carolina. My hair is mostly grey now, thinning on top and I didn't get any taller since I last saw you, unfortunately. LOL. But I'm OK with that. I moved here from southern, Ohio last October. Before that I was in upstate NY (not NY city). Before that I was in Toronto area and prior to that I was in Ottawa. A couple of years ago I was fortunate enough to find a lakeside property here with a run-down house on a lake so I bought it and have been fixing it up ever since. It's been a lot of work and a lot of money but it's in pretty good shape now and I just love the property. We get to watch a beautiful sunset on the water every night so I feel blessed in that regard. I built a dock and we bought my wife a small (used) sailboat. We're still getting the hang of it since neither of us sail but it's fun and it looks nice tied up to the dock. My physical health is good. It would probably be better if I exercised more but I hate exercise. I would rather go for a 3 mile walk/hike or a 50 mile bike ride than run on a treadmill.
My job is in the high-tech industry, same as I have been for the past 25+ years I guess. I work at home currently. My office is a converted dining room that I walled up and put a door on. It's a bit small but it's OK. The space problem is compounded because I also do my hobby, which is IoT electronics stuff. You know, Internet of Things kind of stuff. I love to tinker with micro-controllers and make them do cool things like send me a text message when the mail arrives or if there's a water leak under the sink. It's a fun hobby and not too expensive. Anyway, I work for a company out of Cincinnati and have clients across the US. None in Canada at the moment but I did have one in Calgary for about 14 months a few years back.
My wife's name is Melissa. She is the mother of two boys and one girl. Megan is 22, Ryan, in the middle, is 19 and Max takes up the rear at 14. Ryan is visiting us for a couple of weeks then he has to go back to OH. Ryan is 2nd year university in Ohio and Max lives with his dad. Megan is in her 4th year at a university in Indiana. We normally live alone but the kids, my dad, M's sisters, brothers and so on often visit so we're only alone about 1/2 the time anyway. Melissa has a Masters degree in accounting and is the CFO of a local company that does lighting, generators and stages for big events like the Superbowl. She likes being a big fish in a little pond and I'm proud of her for that. :-)
We met in Cincinnati, OH a couple years ago, fell in love and decided to get married last August so we're newly-weds. Just a couple of crazy kids. LOL. We like a lot of the same things like camping, hiking, cycling and riding my Harley. Last year we took Ryan on a 10 day adventure for his graduation gift. We flew to Phoenix, Arizona then drove to Sequoia National Park then to Yosemite Park then we drove to San Francisco for the last couple of days of our journey. It was a great trip. Probably the best vacation of my life and I hope to do it again someday. We'll see. :-)
I have one dog at the moment, her name is Daisy. I've had her for 11 years and she's the laziest Shi Tzu you'll ever meet. Sleeps all day...literally. We're thinking about getting another dog as a playmate so maybe she'll move once in a while but we're still looking. It's got to be the right dog. I had her staying at a dog-sitter while I traveled once in a while and one of the dogs there attacked her. Popped her eyeball right out of the socket. She needed surgery to put it back in and since then she has been slowly going blind. I think completely in one eye and about 20% left in the other eye. Good thing she sleeps a lot. :-( She's a good dog though, very obedient and never messes in the house. She only barks when the doorbell rings so she's pretty quiet most of the time, which is good since I don't like yappy dogs.
That's my life in a nutshell. This blog isn't going to be just about me but I wanted to let you know where I am currently and what I'm doing. In Chapter 2 I will be talking to Adam in general but also to the girs as well. Later chapters I'll address you both in more detail and go tell you about what happened from my perspective.
Thanks for reading this. I know you are mad at me so I just ask you to keep the flames to a minimum until I have had a chance to explain myself. You just might see things a little differently if you get both sides of the story instead of just what you hear from others.
I love you. Please call.
Love, Dad
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